You try to push all those thoughts back, but they just won’t go away.
It eats away at you.
You feel emotional.
On the verge of crying.
You force yourself to stop though.
The emotions you’re feeling are pointless.
There’s no need.
But you still let it eat away at you.
Sometimes I get real in my head. This is an unfinished blog that I had started a couple months ago. I never finished. I still get in my head so bad. I hate it. I have trouble trying to talk myself out of bad thoughts. Sometimes I end up crying from how bad my thoughts are. One day someone said it sounds like you deal with anxiety. I hadn’t heard someone tell me I had anxiety since I was in 8th grade. The minute I realized it I stopped the thoughts.
But, I have my days still. It hasn’t been as bad, but I still have those days.
Good evening! Hello, to all my lovely readers. So I decided to ask a friend what I should write about? To basically give me an idea on what I should write. Well, he told me instead of writing a depressing one, what about a happy one? Well…here I am..ready to write a happy blog. Let’s begin shall we?
Oh jeez, what is something that has made me happy lately? Well, Vincent’s dad bought a house in Jackson. That’s a plus. I really want Vincent to go to school in Jackson and finally!…he’ll be going there. I am super stoked!
Hrm…what else has made me happy? My son for sure. He always makes me happy. Seeing him makes me happy. Spending all my time with him makes me happy. I wish I saw him every week. Of course though, his dad and I do 50/50. So every other week for us it is. Seeing him grow makes me happy as well. He’s so smart for his age, and he’s starting to become independent…come on child you’re only two calm down!
Wine….wine makes me happy.
Honestly, lately, I’ve been pretty annoyed by friends and family. I don’t know what it is. It’s like, leave me the fuck alone. I want to be lonely and drink my wine. Watch my anime as well in peace. There’s only been ONE person that I have honestly loved talking too..maybe too much. (Vinnie does not count, I’m never annoyed by him, unless he’s being a butthead). So, uh yeah, it’s strange, but, pretty awesome…
That’s about all I got for right now, enjoy this short read guys!