Merry Christmas

Vincent getting into his presents.
Opening presents at gmas
He’s obsessed with toy story
He is one happy Vinnie. ❤️
Over at the boyfriends house, well it’s our friend Sarah’s, but he currently lives there.
Blayde!
Dj!
Just chillin’
Ella my little sister
The boyfriend ❤️
My dad is rude.
Aunt Rhonda

❤️💜

German Day

Good morning! Here are some pictures and videos from German Day yesterday! Sorry I haven’t been writing. I still just have no honest clue what to write about. Hopefully, at some point I’ll get back into it!

Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoy! ❤️

Vincent loves my sunglasses.
For some reason he loves the flash on my camera.
Midway laughing.
This is Dj our friends son, he was cold.
Ryan my love, and his son Blayde creeping.

Life Update

Ah man, where do I begin?

It feels like forever since I last blogged.

What have I been up to?

Just busy, with work, my son, and spending a bunch of time with my boyfriend.

Work is, well work.

I’m so unhappy at work.

It’s just a bunch of bullshit and I can’t stand the place.

Other than seeing my man there.

Which we’ll see each other maybe once or twice while at work.

My son, well he’s just getting bigger and bigger.

Very rebellious.

Talking a bunch.

It’s super tiring though.

I started today trying to potty train him again.

The first time I tried I honestly didn’t think he was ready.

It’s no bueno.

He hates it. Haha

But, other than the potty training I’ve just been spending all my time with him.

Giving him all my love and just trying to be the best mom I can be.

It’s hard to do everything with a job that doesn’t pay shit and paying soooooo many bills.

It’s a struggle, but I’m making it through and keeping my son happy.

The boyfriend?

Well, every other week when I don’t have Vincent, I’m spending my time with him and also one day out of that week I see his son.

We bullshit, drink, hangout, and just spend literally every waking moment with each other.

It’s pretty amazing.

Well, that’s an update as if what I’ve been up too. We may be possibly going to Oktoberfest on Saturday so if we do, I’ll be sure to take pictures and videos and post a blog of that.

Thanks for reading. ❤️

Fairtime/familytime

Good morning! I know, it’s been a few days…but here’s some pictures and videos from Friday night at the Semo fair. Enjoy! ❤️

I also think this is the very first time that I am actually showing Vinnies face in my blogs. I’m very particular, and don’t post a lot of pictures of him on social media. So enjoy seeing his face for the first time! 🙂

Drunken thoughts on being alone

Holy shit….

I’m single,

Finally, by myself once again

Honestly, it’s amazing!

I found myself unhappy during this relationship..

Why?

I was no where near ready for one.

I honestly let the things he said crawl into my head and convince me that I could try and see how things would go.

I just wanted to be alone.

Be alone, focus on me, my son, our life

I enjoy being alone,

I don’t have someone up my ass 24/7

Telling me what I can and can’t do.

I feel free.

Honestly, my relationship before that,

Just really fucked with my head,

The fear of someone appearing into my life and my sons life,

And out of nowhere just fades away…scares me..

It’s better this way, to wait, to focus on myself and my son,

I can do better,

I can find better,

Someone who will want to be with me and my son,

Love both of us,

As of right now though?

It’s me and my son against the world.

Thanks for reading. ❤️

Decisions..

Good evening! Ugh, I know, I know, it’s been a minute. I’ve just had a lot of shit going on and just honestly didn’t have the time or space to actually write a blog. Well here I am, sick and decided to write a blog. My dad is distracting a Vinnie for me for a little bit.

So what decisions did I have to make? Well I ended that relationship, moved out ASAP, and moved back in with my dad. Why did I decided to breakup with what’s his face? Well because, I’m just not ready. I’m not ready to commit to someone, I knew I wasn’t. I still tried though because he begged me to try and that trying was better than not trying at all.

I honestly should’ve just stayed on my own from the get go, because I was more than sure that I would end it. We’re still friends, but he had pissed me off to the point of, I’m not sure if I should be his friend. It is what it is though.

I moved out right away because well he started an argument and it just full blown pissed me off and I was like, “I’m done with this bull shit.” I texted my dads landlord and we arranged me to move back in. So right away after one day, I was out, I still have to get some stuff, but it’s not much.

So, currently, I am back with my dad, and saving up money for 8 months and then I’ll have to find my own place. What sucks though is that my paycheck with as many bills as I have will be hard to save up. I already struggle enough. I know I can do it though. It’ll be tough, but I gotta get it together for me and my son.

What do I plan to do once I’m moved out in my own place? Stay single as fuck, focus on myself, focus on my child, and get some stuff done in the making.

Thanks for reading. ❤️