Are you a single mom? Does it bother you to be a single mom? Well, it shouldn’t! Even if shit gets hard you just tough it up and be the greatest mom you can be. That right there is me. I’m a struggling single mom. Yes, I was in a 6 month relationship, but he wasn’t ready to be a stepfather. He also in all honesty, realized that he couldn’t accept a kid that wasn’t his. Which has seriously fucked with my head if I’m being quite honest. Why waste 6 months of my life to just dump me because you realized that you couldn’t handle a package deal? It is, what it is and in my heart I know that it is better that we are no longer together. My son comes first, no matter what.
When the relationship ended I realized that it was time for me to just stay on my own. To focus on my son and myself are my two top priorities. Now, am I the perfect mother? Well, no. Honestly, I’ve had my fair share of rebounds, and even catch myself interested in one of them. He wasn’t a rebound though, just someone I liked, and well things happen. I’m only human, and sex is natural, shit happens. But, yes we have continued to talk and see where things go. No we are not a couple, but we have told each other that we’d like to see where things go in the next few months. Because honestly, I can’t be 100% committed just yet, it’s like I still need time. However, he has met Vincent and he really likes him. Before anyone judges, we act like friends in front of him, nothing else.
So, I’m a single mom who is slowly talking to someone and taking care of my son. I’m also struggling like crazy due to money issues, but my friend does help me and so has my family. It means the world to me, but at the same time I hate it because I literally hate asking anyone to help me out. I am very much thankful though. Things are finally looking up as I finally got offered a full time job! Hopefully, this rut that I’m in will get better now! I have a part time retail job, but it doesn’t pay the bills and I only work like two days a week. I don’t make shit to be quite honest, so I’ve been on top of finding a full time job. I finally had some good luck and I’m thankful for that as well.
I don’t ask anyone to help me with my son. Like, I don’t ask my parents to watch him on my time because I want all that time for myself. Yes, he see’s his family, but I’m always there. I try to teach him, and feed him good. I always interact with him, unless he gets mad because he wants to be independent and play on his own. Breaks my heart when he does that. I try to take him anywhere and everywhere to get out of the house. Sometimes though, we’ll just stay at home and I steal all the cuddles I can from him. This every other week thing sucks. I always miss him within a couple days, sometimes less. I wish I could have him every week.
Now, I can’t remember if I explained why the visitations are like that. His father wanted the visitations like that due to him wanting time to himself. I tried to offer other visitations, but he wouldn’t work with me on that. So to avoid conflict I just agreed. We have decided that we will go to mediation or possibly court at some point though. Just so that we have our agreements on paper. It sucks, but that’s how shit goes down sometimes. If the time comes and I’m able to change the visitations than I will, because I would love for Vincent to see both of us every week instead of seeing one of us every other week.
Moving on from that, it has been hard being a single mom. I don’t ask his father to help me nor do I expect money from him either. I take care of everything on my side when I have him. If I had to describe my life as a movie I would choose the movie Bad Moms. I’m seriously Mila Kunis’s character in that movie. Watch that movie and you’ll understand what I mean. I’m always on the run, I cry all the time, I try to give Vincent good meals, I try my best to give him the best and show him the best I can be. It is definitely hard. It’s also worth it though, just to see my son happy and healthy.
I love my son to death, and I love being his mother. ❤
Thanks for reading.
On a side note, the part about the visitations and his father aren’t meant to attack him in any certain way. So please don’t take it that way. 🙂